I had established this bad bitch persona, though it can feel underwhelming at times. And sometimes, walking on the street and my mind wandered through many sexual escapades I have had, I developed a weird feeling that someone would be staring at me, wondering how defiled and dirty I was. I had tried many times to liberate myself from the guilt of sexual purity, but I still get clouded by those feelings whenever my mind wanders into sexual immorality.
After taking my bath and was preparing for an afternoon lecture, I sat down and thought about the party we were preparing for the evening. It was a Friday and parties happened around the campus vicinity during the weekend. When you returned, you slept throughout Saturday. I had gotten close to Benjamin, the dark-skinned guy I was crushing on, at my faculty. We met a day at an angle after my lecture while I waited for Pelumi. I paid attention to my phone, my back leaned against the pole waiting for my friend to arrive.
I scrolled through Instagram, giggling at those funny contents and some random contents posted by some pages on social media. I felt a hand move on my shoulder. The person was taller than me, so I felt it. I looked up and was shocked at the moment. I took in his eyes and he did mine. We locked eyes together and I felt a kinda tingly feeling hovered over me and my body tickled. Instead of saying the first word, he continued staring at me, silence overwhelmed us. Spittle dried in my mouth, my heart stopped palpitating and I finally said the first word. "Oh. You," I said. I have never cared to ask for his name before.
"Oh, you," he said, smiling. "you don't know my name. But I know yours is Dennis," he said, smiling.
When he smiled, his cheekbones went deeper. At that moment, I died twice and rose again. I had never seen him smile. He had some nice set of teeth and his lips moved in a way I could not tell but I liked them. I wanted to ask how he knew my name was Dennis, but couldn't stop staring at him. His dark-skinned Adonis body, his well-aligned cheekbones, his thick brows, how the barber trimmed his hair. He was beardless, though I had a thing for bearded men but he made my body clasped in sexual yearning and I had a semi-erection.
"How did you know my name?" I finally said. I knew he might be wondering why I had been behaving in a funny way.
He said he had always heard friends call my name. My eyes moved towards a chair at the faculty, and I asked him if he cared we went there to sit as I was waiting for my course mate. Pelumi was waiting for the lecturer to attend to her before she came. I had been frustrated waiting for her, now, I didn't feel anything. I sat down and he sat beside me, his body against mine. His clothes, his flesh, warm and loving. We continued talking. He said he was a 400L History student and I was a 300L philosophy student. When we finished talking, he asked if I'd love to attend one of his Friday parties. I wanted to say No but refrained.
He was likely a heterosexual man. Or maybe bisexual? Or maybe gay. If he was anyone of them, the party would be about straight men and women. I didn't want to be there, and someone out of nowhere will assign me a babe to dance with. I had girls swooning over me, but it won't make sense, to start behaving uncomfortably when I was finally there and would be assigned to one. Again, I thought I was someone who can't be forced to do anything that I did not approve of. Since growing up, I had not seen someone dictate for me. I can be there, sitting on my own and having a drink by myself. Then, Benjamin, as he told me his name was, will come at times and I behold his handsome face. I finally agreed. Before he left I stood up and he hugged me tight. He was wearing joggers as usual. I had always seen him wearing joggers. Whether it's trouser or short. But he had always worn joggers of different colours. When he hugged me, I felt his penis touch me and his face rested on my head.
As I sat on the bed after dressing up for class, my heart didn't stop beating, thinking about how the party would be. Also, I was having one of the tough classes with a tough lecturer. Since I had sex with Adewale, I tried as much as possible not to meet his gaze. The last time I did, smiled at him, he frowned in disgust and I looked away. Since then, I had not seen him again. He might have seen me and might assume I don't give a fuck about him again. But I don't mind getting down with him again. When I return from class, I will prepare for the party.